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The Fascinating Retired Life of Dan Haren

I love twitter especially when people use it in great ways. Dan Haren was one of those people yesterday. Here are the twitter thoughts of Dan Haren:

I'm on an exercise bike, bored, so here are some things about my baseball career that come to mind......


 I went into almost every start the last few years thinking... How the hell am I gonna get these guys out


 There's was at least 3-4 times I thought the team plane was gonna crash.



I would count out the days about a month in advance to see if I was gonna pitch in Coors field.


 One of my favorite moment ever was hitting a homer off Chris Carpenter. I took my time running the bases.


 I gave up 11 runs in Toronto and got the win one time.



 I had to take Imodium most days I pitched to plug myself up. 💩


 My only superstition was to make sure I had 2 glasses of wine the night before I pitched. This ties in with the Imodium


 I gave up so many homers cause I didn't wanna walk people. That and cause I threw 85 mph meatballs sometimes.


 Why the hell did B.J. Upton hit so many homers off me..... This probably ties into the last tweet as well. I did much better facing Melvin


 I only hit like 5-7 people on purpose


 My threat to retire didn't quite work last offseason


 Sometimes when the count was 3-1, I would just throw it down the middle and hope for the best. People pop up in batting practice right


 Ok I'm done with the bike, time to go lift Bi's and tri's.

There you have it, the amazing retired life of Dan Haren. What a treat of tweets. Let's break down a few of them.

The game where he gave up 11 runs and got the win didn't really happen exactly as he said. It took place on August 21st, 2006 in the Rogers Centre. Haren was pitching for the Athletics and was matched up against Ted Lilly.  He went 5 and 2/3 innings and gave up 9 earned runs while getting the win. The final score was 12-10. Here is the complete box score

Haren clearly did not like pitching in Colorado. He made 11 starts there in his career going 5-5 with a 5.56 ERA giving up 19 homeruns in 68 innings pitched.

He faced Melvin Upton 41 times, walked him just once but Upton went deep off of him 6 times, the most of any batter Haren faced. Ryan Howard is next with 5. Upton had a total of 12 hits and hit .300

I think every retired MLB player should be required to tweet out gems like these....maybe we could do without the reason behind using Imodium on days they pitch though.

You can follow Haren on twitter @ithrow88

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